Genesis 2 verse 18. “And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”

What are the indices for readiness in Marriage? Could this be the major determinant of Marriage bliss? The answers to these questions form the bedrock, informs or explain why some Marriages are getting better with each passing day, while others break apart due to irreconcilable differences? In this article I would attempt to give insights into these questions by the grace of God, helping us discover the secrets of marital bliss. These secrets will help any man or woman intending to get married or to stay married having entered into one.

There are two words I would like to break down and the explanations to these words will give us a clear perspective as to understanding the thought line I have been inspired by the Holy Spirit to share.

Beginning with readiness, what is readiness? Readiness is the state of being fully prepared for something. I would like you to note that word; “being fully prepared.” Is it possible that the reason why most Marriages fail is because either of the couple or both the man and the woman are inadequately prepared for the marital journey? This preparation could be psychological, financial, physical, spiritual etc.  Another definition of readiness I found very interesting says readiness is the willingness to do something. And when you are willing to do something your heart, your desire, will, inclination disposition, emotions, attention and all of your mind is concentrated at that thing. Marriages fail to reach its peak point or let’s say its blissful point because of double mindedness and refusal of either of the spouse to give their all. At such a point it is said that readiness is not attained. And when readiness or willingness is not attained, it will be difficult to experience bliss in your marital union.

What is Marriage? Marriage in its simplest term is a union or the coming together between a man and a woman in holy matrimony. It is the legally or formally recognized union of two people, in an ideal situation; the man and woman as partners in a personal relationship. So, readiness in Marriage talks about the coming together of a man and a woman who have forsaken their all and are willing to give their all as they journey towards destiny. Marriage is a beautiful thing, I say this because it is an institution founded, nourished and established by God. And what ever God makes or creates is good. This speaks to the fact that if you say Marriage is not good, then you are simply going against the order or ordinance of God. If you have seen distorted Marriages or unhealthy Marriages, it is because there has been a perversion or deviation from the norm; the original blue print of God. Jesus said in the beginning it was not so. Meaning that Marriage was perfect at the creation of it. So, how does this apply to each and everyone of us? What kind of information must we equip ourselves with, that will ultimately equip us or get us ready for the kind of Marriage we desire?

As you read along you may be encountering something you have known before, or something you are discovering for the first time but I implore and beseech you by the mercies of God to read to the end with an open mind. And I believe very strongly that the Lord will bless you tremendously. If there is any weakness in the delivery of this piece the fault is mine due to limitation in understanding and expression and due to the fact that we know in path and we prophesy in part. It is never the fault of the Holy Spirit.

So, Genesis 2 verse 18 says; “And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” God said it is not good for the man to be alone. God called Adam a man. One of the first thing you must note is that Marriage is not for the immature, it is not for babes, Marriage is for men. Man here does not refer to age, height or muscles, man here is one who by the reason of use have their senses exercised. What kind of sense am I talking about here? The spiritual senses. A man is one who has attained maturity in the spirit and operating and functioning in Gods purpose. Marriage is for those who have grown to become men. Men who have attained stature in the Spirit. When I am talking about grown to become a man, I mean one who has been able to successfully put away childish things. i.e., talking like a child and having the thoughts of a child.  A man who has not attained to this requirement is not ready and may make a mess out of his Marriage. If you are married and you are wondering why you have not began to see certain experiences you desire in your Marriage, the question is; how do you speak? How do you act? What are the childish things you have been able to put away until now? So, as a single, before you begin to think of Marriage you must be sure if you have grown to become a man.

When a man or woman who has not grown gets married it will be difficult to actually fulfill the purposes of God in that Marriage.

Apostle Paul speaking in Hebrews 5 verse 12, He said; “In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God’s word all over again. You need milk, not solid food!” then he went further to say in verse 13; “Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. ¹⁴But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil.” So, when God said it is not good for the man to be alone, what does it mean? It means that Marriage is the coming together of the male man and the female man who have grown not by chronological age but by the virtue of their spiritual senses’ been exercised, so they have been able to distinguish between good and evil, the permissive will of God and the perfect will of God. In order to build a lasting Marriage or begin on the right step to marry your sensitivity and discernment must be sharp to pick the signals of God.

In Genesis chapter 1 verse 26 the Bible says; “Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion.” See what it says; “let them.” God began by saying let us make man. This looks like a word that is singular in its reference but then He said let “them have” now we understand that God was referring to both the male and female man who are fully conscious of Gods purpose, receiving and utilizing every instruction God has passed down to them God. So, God's intention was to give dominion to the man and the woman and that is found or rooted in the coming together of the man and the woman in institution of Marriage.  

Again, in verse 28 Bible says then God blessed them, i.e., the male man and the female man. It says; “Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion.” The Marriage commands a certain blessing and that blessing is what guarantees dominion. God said let them have dominion in Genesis 1 verse 26 and Genesis 1 verse 28. So, inherent in the experience of dominion is the blessing of fruitfulness, multiplication filling the earth and subduing it. But these experiences are the blessings that can become a reality through the instrumentality of Marriage. What is the implication of this? It means that in addiction to the blessing of father in-laws and mother in laws, if the male and the female man fail to receive the blessing of God, such a Marriage is either not ready to enjoy all of God or such a Marriage will not experience bliss.

Thanks for the gift of your time, Apeh Francis Abah!
Feel free to share your thoughts or testimony in the comment box below. I promise to respond as soon as possible!